Fear of speaking? Or futile hope?

Hello

Here is my dream. I was afraid when I woke up. I tried to analyze it, but I need you to reassure me or warn me?

My situation:
My brother is getting married in two months, and I have been separated from my boyfriend for three months. He is trying to stay in touch with me (via text and phone), but we haven't had a chance to see each other yet (due to travel, work, etc.). So psychologically, I am happy for my brother and sad for myself. Especially since I am older than him (I am 37 and he is 32). That gives you an idea of my current state of mind.

My dream (and my interpretation):
I am in my house where there is a party with a lot of people and Family coming from Greece (my brother’s wedding?), I am going to welcome the Family and it is true that I am worried about where I will house everyone. Because of the crowd, we are squeezed into the bedrooms. When I go to bed, I share the bed with a girlfriend, a tenant of mine, and my (ex) boyfriend who comes to bed with us, but my girlfriend is in the middle, between us (there is a problem between him and me since he wanted to break up even though he is trying to get closer to me). I am angry at him and when we get up, I am distant (normal, he hurt me). During the day, he behaves a bit like a madman but manages to calm the Jeopardy and get closer to me (for now, everything is fine and I feel good even in my sleep). I realize that I have a chewing gum, at least a paste in my mouth that I remove and throw away but which reforms and sticks between my teeth. I am with him in the garden and we walk around almost reconciled. I move away a bit to remove this paste again and I try to get it all out. I pull and eventually, it becomes an endless thread (like the magicians with scarves in their mouths). The problem, and this is where I was afraid, is that I had the impression that this thread was coming out of my tongue and, at one point, by pulling hard because I wanted to remove it at the root (?), it was even soaked in blood. I bit it with my teeth to cut it.

At first, I thought I should be careful about what I say. It’s true that sometimes I’m too spontaneous and don’t think things through before speaking: should I turn my tongue around in my mouth fifteen times? Or do I have trouble expressing myself and being understood? And is it time for me to speak and truly express what’s deep inside me, rather than just the superficial?

But then I thought it was related to hope? Even if my ex reaches out from time to time talking about reconciliation, the actions don't follow. So, I want to reconcile, but shouldn't I stop waiting and cut things off completely, even if it hurts?

Thank you in advance for your help

Oceanne

Good evening Oceanne3,
As soon as I have a moment, I will be happy to reply to you.
Friendly
Ladysally

Hello Oceanne3,
In your soul's consciousness, in your inner life, where intimate life unfolds, confusion and the disorder of the psyche reign.
Right now, you need warmth, exchange, and sharing. However, you lack confidence, feeling somewhat like an outsider, though you do have some news. A union, contract, or agreement must be made. You are cold, ambivalent, and fearful, and you do not know how to get rid of a difficulty, frustration, hindrance, or obstacle in the organization of your life. There is an uncomfortable situation in your marital or sexual life. (“The bed” is the place where the fundamental acts of life take place: birth, love, and death. All fears and desires related to these important moments will have the bed as their setting.)
So there is a share of responsibility in what is happening: sharing a bed with your girlfriend in the center prevents a natural fulfillment from taking place. You run away, you don’t accept it, stung in your pride, you don’t understand his way of acting, taking him for a madman, and then you reconsider, saying, “Well, I’ll accept it,” hence this feeling of well-being. But there you go, you ruminate and find it hard to get rid of the idea in your head. You pull yourself out, and there it starts again, preventing you from having bite and backbone. You lack the energy to fight and defend yourself in a position of inferiority, powerless in the face of a situation you cannot digest.
Everything will eventually work out and fall into place with this "walk in the garden" that will ease your suffering. It's over for you to keep ruminating on "pulling hard" over all these little worries and troubles, and doing so while carrying with you the problem of "its root." Yes, for you it was a painful experience, you have lost a lot of "energy," and as soon as you forget and let it go, you will come out even stronger, ready and prepared to defend yourself with your "teeth." To break this thread that means nothing but worries and troubles.
Best regards
Ladysally

Thank you very much for your interpretation!
That really describes the situation well. Even scary dreams can sometimes carry hope.
In the end, it’s the kind of dream that can give you confidence in the future!
Best regards
Oceanne

Hello Oceanne3,
Thank you for this dream interpretation.
I wish you energy and a fresh breath in your life.
Friendly
Ladysally